For the love of little green apples!!!!!

That’s something my grandmother used to say, in order to avoid swearing around us when we were kids.

So, one of the deleted scenes from the Captain Marvel movie is when the skeezy biker guy hits on her, he “asks” her to smile, walks up, invades her space, pushes her map down, and tells her he can “help” her.

She offers her hand, he goes in for a crushing handshake, and in response she squeezes the shit out of his hand, while giving him a zap for good measure. And then steals his jacket and motorcycle.

The majority of the women, and many of the men, I know thinks this scene is brilliant.

But a bunch of dudes and a few women looking to collect their exceptional girl points are all up in arms about this, and how it makes her a villain.

Fucking seriously, dude in your “Han shot first” shirt?

The guy was creeping on a woman that he thought he could overpower and probably sexually assault. That’s what that little dance was all about, seeing if he could push her limits and get her to give ground so he could coerce or hurt her into sex.  If anyone thinks that rape isn’t where that guy was headed, you sweet, summer child.

She turned the tables on his would-be assault of her by pulling a move pulled by male protagonists in all kinds of media for at least the last seven decades: crushing handshake.

In fact, the crushing handshake trope has been the subject of parody since the 1950s.

Ok, if we go by this criteria, that she hurt the guy because she’s super strong, and that she stole his jacket and motorcycle, then pretty much every male super hero out there is a villain, too.  Because Captain America punches a WHOLE LOT of non-powered Hydra guys with his super strength, and hits them with that vibranium shield that causes exponential amounts of damage. In at least two of the movies he steals cars.

Ant-Man is a convicted thief, yet he gets to be a hero.

Tony Stark’s weapons killed thousands if not millions, and one of his great ideas destroys an Eastern European city.

That scene has Captain Marvel doing nothing that dozens if not hundreds of male protagonists have not done over decades of media, and yet she’s a villain.

Seriously… I just need the pearl clutching to die down, and for all of ya’ll losing your shit over this to just admit that you hate women.

I mean, watching dudes go through verbal gymnastics to explain why that scene, a scene that was deleted from the film, makes her a villain has been truly inspiring… of nausea.

Look, you don’t have to like the movie.  That’s fine.  But the blatant misogyny on display lately is truly astounding.

I get it, you don’t get why this scene might resonate with women who have spent their entire lives being harassed.  Not everyone has a developed sense of empathy.  But just fucking be honest with us and yourself about why it bothers you.

And because of the exceptionally limited, and rather stupid, way a lot of people read this on Twitter allow me to say one more thing.

If the scene just didn’t resonate with you, or didn’t work for you, but doesn’t otherwise change your mind about the film or character, I am not talking to you.

I’m talking about the chorus of people in their “Han Shot First,” and Deadpool gear who are screeching about misandry.

If it isn’t about you, it isn’t about you.

Oh, hey, if you want an actual LAWYER to explain why what Captain Marvel did isn’t illegal, here you go.

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