The most annoying part of the migraines is that apparently movies in theaters is everything my brain hates right now, so I’m not going to them unless I feel very strongly about them.

I finally saw Venom, and I loved it!

Yes, it has plot holes and brings up something that completely frosts my cookies when it comes to Hollywood and women.  But I really enjoyed it.  I liked the interplay with the symbiote and Eddie.  The scene where he first catches a glimpse of the symbiote in the bathroom mirror, screams and knocks his own ass out is hilarious.

I trust I’m not spoiling anything for anyone, it’s been out for awhile.

Ok, so I get why a lot of people did not like the movie.  It takes a largely irredeemable character (two of them, because Eddie’s kind of a shitbird in the comics), and makes them relatively heroic. Or anti-heroic.   Granted, if I remember right, there are several plot points in the comics regarding the “corruption” of the symbiotes by the minds of their hosts

Anyway, yes, there were a few gaping plot holes.

A. How or why did. Dr. Skirth, Jenny Slate’s character, not realize there would be camera footage of whoever she brought in?  I mean, her boss seems like the kind of guy who has a CCTV camera up his own ass so he isn’t surprised by needing to shit at an inopportune moment.  I mean, seriously.

B. Anne seemed to take biting the head off that bad guy toward the end far too well. I mean, yeah, they were bad guys so bad they crushed puppies and mainlined kittens every thirty seconds, but still.  Not to mention, we have seen the symbiotes kill everyone they haven’t been a match for, yet she walks away unscathed.  WTF?

I do not care about the scientific explanation for why Venom can’t happen.  I am perfectly happy to handwave the science for the benefit of the fiction.  All I’m asking is internal consistency.

I totally get why Tumblr fell in love with this movie.

Eddie’s relationship with Venom is kind of brilliant.

Tom Hardy is a great actor, and I really enjoy watching his films. He was wonderful at the physical comedy.  Also, he cuddles shelter dogs.

Now, the thing that annoyed the fuck out of me.

Ok, first, this movie does not past the Bechdel test.  Surprising very few.

You know from the start that Jenny Slate’s character is smart because she is a woman wearing glasses.  The only NAMED woman wearing glasses, and she isn’t conventionally attractive by Hollywood standards. So, nerdy smart lady type.

😐

I mean, Anne’s smart, but no glasses.  Dr. Skirth, glasses so SUPER smart.  Except she didn’t realize there would be fucking cameras every three feet in her boss’s super secret evil torture factory.

Ok, I’m done griping about that plot hole.

Jenny Slate is a very attractive woman.

But we aren’t supposed to think she is, because Hollywood. This is the same Hollywood who told  us Janeane Garofalo in The Truth About Cats and Dogs, was fat and unattractive. She is A. tiny and B. cute, even if her humor has turned to garbage.  Sadly.

Jenny Slate also funny AF, which is what unconventionally attractive women in Hollywood do.  If you aren’t the sort of statuesque, WASP-y beauty that Hollywood loves, or a WOC with very anglo-looks, you frequently get typecast as the “funny best friend.” Granted, she is thin enough she has been cast as a love interest, you know, to show that the smoking hot hero isn’t shallow.

sigh.

Ok, in a nutshell, I fucking hate how Hollywood views women, and how they cast them.

Am I the only one who wonders if she’s ever pulled the Missy voice from Big Mouth out on Chris Evans?  I think they’re dating again.  I want them to be.  Her dating Chris Evans feels almost like when plus-sized actress Camryn Manheim got to have an actual sexy sex scene on The Practice, and won an Emmy, yelling, “This is for the fat girls!” It’s like a nerdy, funny woman finally gets to date a hot dude! Instead of, you know, the other way around which people take for granted.

All right, I have more of a rant, but it’s even further off topic than this is.  I’ll try to make somewhat coherent and post it later.

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